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FIC: One Purpose chap 3 (AU Angel/Spike)

Posted on 2007.04.22 at 19:18
Current Location: my room
Current Mood: restlessrestless
Tags: ,
Title:One Purpose
Rating:NC-17, eventually
Summary:AU Spike left for London when his young heart was broken by a twist of fate. Years have passed and things have changed. Now he comes back to reclaim what he left behind.
Disclaimer:I don't own anything from AtS or BtVS.
Feedback:I'd really appreciate it.

Previous chapters are here

Spike sits in the sofa, stretching his legs and arms to ease the soreness which he received from the long flight. He looks around the apartment while Angel has gone to retrieve some refreshments for both of them.

The older man was not too happy and made a small grimace when Spike asked for a bottle of beer. But, without giving any negative comments, he left for the refrigerator, which is actually close to the sofa Spike is currently occupying in this small apartment.

Spike is slightly surprised to see Angel living in a place like this, surrounded by deadly cold bare concrete walls in the basement. Angel always used to be the center of attention. In Sunnydale, it being a small town, everyone worshipped him. The blonde imagined Angel some day would live in a penthouse in the center of the city, with more than adequate sunlight lit in the room, not a damp place like this.

Spike watches the way Angel’s shoulder muscles flex as he bends over to pick up beer bottles from the refrigerator. The dark gray sweater the brunette is wearing perfectly hangs from his body.

When the front door opened and Angel emerged from it, Spike almost dropped the cigarette out of his mouth. He would have opened his mouth and drooled all over his precious boots, if it had not been for the deep breaths he had taken in order to relax, before finally gathering up the courage to knock the door.

Angel was as handsome as ever. Warm dark chocolate eyes. Spiky short brunette hair. Tall and muscular. He has lost the childishness and naivety that he still had when Spike had first seen him. The skins around his eyes tell that he has aged, but it only implies that he has grown up into a matured full adult.

Looking down at the clothes he is in, Spike sighs softly. A cheap punk, that is what he is. How hard he tries, he always stays younger and never able to catch up to Angel. The older man would never consider Spike as anything other than a stupid brother-in-law, or soon-to-be ex-brother-in-law.

“So, it’s been how long? 5 years?” the sound of Angel’s voice startles Spike. As he has been too engrossed in his own thoughts, he fails to notice the older man’s return. He is handed with a bottle of cold screwed beer. With a cheeky grin, he takes the offer. “Ta, mate.”

Angel seats himself next to Spike in the sofa, with a comfortable distance apart.

Spike sees a glass of water with ice in the older man’s hand and gives him a questioning gaze.

“I’ve already had enough tonight,” Angel answers the silent question with a shrug. In fact, he does not understand his action either. Typically a couple of glasses of cheap weak whiskey are far from enough for him. But, a strange feeling tugged his heart.

Angel cannot spoil a fine night with William, by showing the weak side of him. William had always looked up to him and Angel liked the way those blue eyes sparked in amazement and respect. He cannot let the younger man see what he has become, a useless drunken scum.

Even though he senses a deep emotion cross the other man’s face, Spike decides to ignore it. He raises his bottle toward the other man and says, “Cheers, mate.”

Angel does the same with his glass. It makes a weak solid noise as they meet in the air.
Angel brings the glass to his lips and takes a sip of the cold water. It soothes his clouded mind subtly. It is then he realizes how thirsty he is and he drinks nearly half of the content in the glass.

Sipping at his beer, Spike turns his head only to have his eyes fixed on the movement of the older man’s throat as the water is gulped down.

Angel’s lips are slightly parted and wet from the water. Angel unconsciously runs his tongue along his lower lip to wipe the water off. Noticing the silent stare from the blonde, he asks, “What?”

Slightly taken aback, Spike answers, averting his eyes from the other man, “Nothing, pet. Absolutely nothing.” He can hear his own heart beating as loud as a thunder. Then, he takes another large gulp.

Observing the young blonde for a moment, he says, “No offence, but what brought you here, Will? You wanted to talk with your sister? ‘Cause Darla isn’t here. She and I are…” He cannot help but hesitate.

“Getting divorced. I know, Angel. I know. My dad told me on the phone. I’m sorry,” Spike says, with his voice darker and softer than usual. He does not miss the sadness flicker in the dark chocolate orbs. More than anything, he wants to reach his hand to Angel’s face and comforts him that he will be there for him. But the fear of being rejected hinders him from doing so.

He notices that the blonde’s mood saddened and understands that William’s appearance has changed significantly but the inner side is still the same. The blonde is even now as compassionate and tender-hearted as Angel remembers from the old days.

Chuckling under his breath, Angel ruffles Spike’s blonde hair affectionately with his big hand. It causes the Spike’s neatly combed blonde hair to muss up and the hints of curls appear at the ends of the hair. He says sweetly, “Thanks.”

There is a comfortable silence between them. Spike can just close his eyes and enjoy this moment, being by the side of Angel. No words are necessary for him. Feeling the older man’s atmosphere beside him makes him feel less incomplete. He is so focused on his own thoughts that he is slightly alarmed by the sudden question from Angel.

“So, again, what brought you back here in California?”

“I thought I’d study here, probably attend UCLA next semester. Fancied trying a new city,” Spike replies softly. It is the answer which he gave to his father when he was demanded the explanation of his leaving London. He unconsciously runs his thumb over his lower lip.

“Anything wrong in London?” Angel asks with a small frown on his face. From the very moment he discovered this young blonde was William, he cannot help but wonder what might have happened him to the once innocent shy youth he knew. He does not normally judge people by their appearance, but in this case, he cannot help it. Outwardly, this blonde seems to be a complete different person.

To be honest, Spike wishes to tell the truth and say, ‘Yea, everything is wrong in London. You aren’t there.’ But he is still not ready for the confrontation that will be sure to follow afterwards. So he picks a reasonable reply, which is not entirely a lie. “It was getting old. A bloke needs some changes in his life.”

Angel can easily tell from the other man’s expression that there is more than he lets out, but he decides not to confront the young blonde. What he feels is a taste of sadness from the fact that William does not find him worthy enough to open up and tell everything, as the blonde used to several years ago.

5 years actually seem to be longer than Angel anticipated.


Even though both of them tactfully distance themselves from each other, they enjoy the conversation and each other’s company. Time flies and Angel is surprised to see the clock read 2:30 when the conversation pauses for a short while.

“Sorry, Will. But I should go to bed now. I have to work from the morning tomorrow too,” Angel says apologetically, standing up from the sofa.

“It’s already that late?” Spike says with a hint of disappointment, but hides it well before the other man notices. He looks up at the man and asks casually, “Mind if I crash here tonight?”

“Sure,” Angel replies readily, accepting the request. It feels nice to have someone from the past who reminds him of the good old times, when things were not so complicated and easier. But after a short moment, he continues with a half-smile on his face, “Well, that is if you don’t mind sleeping in this sofa. You probably noticed but there’s only one bedroom here.”

“Seems comfy enough,” Spike says and bounces on the sofa, beaming a cocky grin like a child.

Angel shakes his head amused as a loud chuckle escapes his mouth. Only being with William for less than a few hours and he has had more fun than he did in these couple of months. He walks toward his bedroom but is stopped by the voice of the blonde.

“Ah, Angel? Can I maybe stay here for a couple of days? Till I find a place of my own?” Spike asks slightly nervously. As much as he wanted to stay with Angel, he does not wish to be any trouble to the older man.

“The sofa is all yours as long as you want, Will,” Angel answers with a sweet smile on his face. It is nice to be counted on by someone. It is the feeling which he has forgotten long time ago. However, the logical part of him is aware that there is no use remembering the past and wishing things were different. It has suppressed his life and prevented him from recovering fully from the accident.

Spike sees the older man off with a childish grin. But the expression soon falls as soon as Angel disappears into his bedroom. He gives a big sigh. It is not as easy as he has expected to have a normal conversation with Angel. The exterior that he has built up in the early time in London helps him significantly because he is already accustomed to being Spike.

If he were to show the side of William, he would soon break down and confess the never-dying love for the older brunette. What would Angel do? He would probably be disgusted by the idea and kick him out into the chilly night of LA. Or worse, he would take pity on the blond and comfort him for a couple of hours with sweet whispers which he would not even mean, then try to act as if nothing happened. Knowing the other man quite well, Spike can easily guess the latter is more likely to occur.

The question is if he wants it. The answer is easy. No. What he wants from Angel is obviously not a pity or a guilty conscience. An attention? Yes and No. He is dying to get attention from the older man, but not because he never fails to do something stupid all the time and Angel has to stay alert to look after him. He wants him to always look at him because Angel cares about him, because his soul craves him. Spike needs Angel’s soul just as he has given his own to the older man all these years ago.

Spike confuses his blonde hair into a mess in frustration. His eyes are down-casted. He needs to figure out not only how to tell his true feeling to Angel but also how to obtain his soul. There is no way that he can take a rejection by the center of his life, the meaning of his whole existence.

With his head in his hands, he sinks into boundless thought.



Well, what did you think? Sorry for the short chapter...


A. G.
alex_go at 2007-04-22 13:40 (UTC) (blessings)
*grins* hot triplet! more please...
mana0819 at 2007-04-23 10:11 (UTC) (blessings)
thanks triplet! more's coming!
jans_intentions at 2007-04-22 15:59 (UTC) (blessings)
Very nice. I caught up on all previous parts.
mana0819 at 2007-04-23 10:12 (UTC) (blessings)
oh yes thank you! i'm happy to hear you read this fic :) i've got to catch up with your updates too!
darkspace99 at 2007-04-22 20:00 (UTC) (blessings)
Poor Spike. Angel needs to get a clue soon and sweep Spike off his feet. Hehe.
mana0819 at 2007-04-23 10:13 (UTC) (blessings)
*grins* yes, angel has to know Spike's feeling. sweeping him off his feet... ah that's nice! i can easily imagin angel doing exactly that to spike!
noura59 at 2007-04-22 20:30 (UTC) (blessings)
i realy love Spike.he loved angel for years ,and leaving home for him but he is strong enough to want nothing less than angel's love :{ Spike needs Angel’s soul just as he has given his own to the older man all these years ago.}...and angel , he had hard and sad time .he is lost in many ways but still had protective feeling for spike. when he try to be strong for Will about drinks. :{He cannot let the younger man see what he has become, a useless drunken scum.}. so thanks was so seansual chapter. and please more.

mana0819 at 2007-04-23 10:30 (UTC) (blessings)
thank you for the comment!
i'm glad to hear you liked those characters. spike's loved him for years and i'm thinking to write more about their past. angel...he's a nice guy whose life is tough on him. you'll know more about them in the next couple of chapters.
ra_hatper at 2007-04-23 09:42 (UTC) (blessings)
Spike is what Angel needs! Soooo good. More!
mana0819 at 2007-04-23 10:31 (UTC) (blessings)
more is coming! yes, spike is what angel needs just like spike needs angel!
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